Are you aware of the 5 common mistakes to stay stuck in social anxiety?
So many people who watch my free webinars haven't got a clue or somehow aware but not 100% conscious that they are acting out these common mistakes.
They deeply desire to breakfree from emotional overwhelm and axe when it comes to engaging in a conversation, building rapport or getting to know someone for the first time.
I'm not just talking about new social interactions. Social anxiety can occur in professional relationships, friendships, intimate relationships, family dynamics and so forth.
Let's get to it. Here are 5 common mistakes we make in social confidence:
MISTAKE #1: Choose self-doubt over self-assurance
Why is it so easy to find yourself in the self-doubt trap? Why is it easier to give into other people's opinions and not assuring your own? Three words. Unhealed inner child. We all have one. What does this mean? In the first 8 years of life, you and I have experienced childhood trauma or painful memories during those periods of times. When these memories aren't healed, the wounded child inside of you becomes stronger and stronger controlling your thoughts and emotions to be reactive and erratic therefore you feel easily overwhelm with doubt, confusion and anxiety because you haven't soothed your inner child.
MISTAKE #2: Be guarded and superficial in conversations
Are you engaging in meaningful or meaningless conversations?
Why do we do it? Nobody wants to bare their soul in a conversation so it's easier to keep things light and disclose little information about yourself. The one who ask questions are the ones who are in control of the conversation because they are directing the flow of the interaction. Being in control of a conversation (touching more so in social and casual interactions) is to keep us safe and avoiding a deeper connection with people because we fear them. Trust is needed by embracing trust within yourself and trusting your discernment when it feels right to drop down your guard and just be yourself.
MISTAKE #3: Stay in your comfort zone
A popular contender. Stay in your comfort zone and you'll be safe. No one can see you, hear you or know you. This is where we hide to cover up our own insecurities and unworthiness. The problem with this is yes you're safe but you're not actually happy because you're not where you want to be and this requires you to go out of your comfort zone to experience what you deeply desire. Yes you'll experience anxiety by taking that next step and that's part of the journey, we all experience it, myself included however this is where we grow and thrive into a deeper level of confidence that money can't buy.
MISTAKE #4: Avoid rejection = Avoid connection
What if you could just let go of the negative connotation of rejection and just see it for what it is? If you think of it this way, we get rejected all the time. Let me put it into perspective, when you apply for a job and you constantly get rejected from online job applications and interviews not progressing or you didn't get the job offer. What that tells me is it's not meant to be. This isn't the job you're meant to be in and this is the same with relationships. Not everyone is going to be your best friend or life partner because it's not meant to be. You're meant to have a different kind of person in your life instead who can support you in your journey to evolve and grow.
MISTAKE #5: Shut people out of your life
This is the easiest way to move on. Why? So you don't feel the impact of the pain or heartache in a relationship breakdown. I can definitely put my hand up that I've done this so many times. This solution would be ideal if you're being stalked, bullied or abused however if you feel someone has let you down, it's not the end of the world. It's your time to confront them and let them know (in an assertive manner) that this isn't working or I'm struggling to understand why you said this or did this. Vulnerability is what we shut out to avoid feeling into the pain from within. Self-expression is the doorway to setting yourself free.
Turn loneliness into worthiness. Help is here. Let's chat on Zoom to see if my trauma recovery programs are right for you to find yourself in trust and triumph.
This private video call is for you if you're driven and committed to results and you want it now. You're willing to do the inner work and invest time and money to make it happen.
Are you ready to find your you and set yourself free?
Book your free private 30 min consultation here.
With Love & Support,
Jessica Goh | Trauma Coach & Healer In Relationship Abuse
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